Separation!!!

Separation…. What does this really mean?

Well as most of you know … William and I are separting. He has come to the conclusion that he doesnt want to be with anyone right now. As he told me last night …. ” If A was 18 and off on her own I would be happy That way I could be hermit.. be by myself with noone around. “  That hit home for me last night. It sent me over the edge from crying and wondering the hell I did to pissed off and ready to try and be strong. No guarantees there. So … I am moving out. My sister came over last night and we started packing. I took all the pictures of our wedding off the wall. Pictures of Disneyland… Pictures of family. Packed them up … Tonight I will do the kitchen and finish the bedroom. Time to move out. All I can do is let him know that I will wait for him. Wait for him to decide. It hard to think that we once talked about being together forever and how we would spend our senior years together. I guess nothing is forever.

The hardest part of today was walking out the door without saying ” bye have a great day at work… LOVE YOU” I just kept telling myself if he wants to be alone then for the next few days.. I need to be invisable. I need to let him feel what he wants and just move on. Learn to be with myself and give him time. Maybe he will find the spark he once had for me and maybe he wont. But I guess that is what Love is all about… Giving time. As my friend told me ” Let your Love loose and if they come back its meant to be.. If not then its there loss and time to find the person that is really worth my tears of happiness”